i seek solace to find
my own meaning for leaving.
grieving may be assuaged by
something more comforting.

for now.

i simply am lost
to the ethereal how
to get scum off my shutters
or honor a vow.

never again.

my dreams are a tease of lofty desires.
i strive to possess the control required,
to slip thru that window so covered in ash.
to drop all my failings like a cow strolling past.

will i notice that moment
if it left me completely?

one must be vigilant
to know what’s worth keeping.

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